Thoughts.com

    Ok let's do this! Celebrity Gossip, Wahoooo!! There’s a three year old breastfeeding on this week’s issue of Time, a basketball player is in hot water over some kiddy porn charges, John Travolta touched the scrotum of his masseur, but all anyone wants to talk about is Obama and homos. What is going on here?

Obviously there is going to always be a debate about same-sex marriage (that’s the proper term, people!) But, there should never be a debate about child pornography, unwanted sexual advances, or kids breastfeeding...who have teeth. I think we can all come together and agree that these three things are inhumane and absurd.

The Travolta case is starting to take a Tiger Woods effect, but it seems to be only men coming forward one by one saying that the actor harassed them, interesting. Denver’s Chris "Birdman" Andersen has been suspended from all franchise activity until his investigation linked to child pornography reaches a conclusion, but he doesn’t really play anyway, so who cares.

And finally, this:

I don’t even need words for this. He will most likely never be teased in school...

I didn't want to but I had to...Just more sleaze.

Sorry if you need to shower again.

If you didn’t watch The Voice, I’m going to need you to back off this blog, and stop judging me. I actually am the opposite of interested in reality talent shows, but this show peaked my interest earlier this year when I learned the singer from one of my favourite bands was in the competition.

Unlike other talent shows, The Voice picks people who are already in the business to compete, which makes for a much better competition/show. The real stars of the show (besides Christina Aguillera's twins) were indie contestants like Charlotte Sometimes, Juliet Simms and Lex Land. People like Jamar Rogers and James Massone, not Jermaine Paul. Are you kidding me? A guy sings a pedophile’s song and all of a sudden he’s the next Luther Vandross? I honestly didn’t care who won as long as Adam Levine’s team didn’t win. Jeremy and I dislike him for obvious reasons.

Who I actually wanted to win wasn’t even in the final four: Jamar Rogers. Jamar is HIV positive with the most positive outlook on life I have ever seen.

And not in a beat you over the head sort of “Life is Good” sort of way. In the most genuine way imaginable; there’s just something about him. I’m sure this won’t be the last time we see him.

    If Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher are dating I’m going to be upset. She is wayyyy too good for him. But I guess they have been dating and stuff, which is now out of my hands because she hasn't responded to my hundreds of letters I have sent to her thus far...She could at least go for someone on her level like Ryan Gosling or Scarlett Johansson.

In other less exciting news Bruno Mars reportedly “came out” a few weeks ago and before I actually did some research (on TMZ, of course) I just believed it. Because let’s face it, he kinda seems gay.

I began dissecting all of his songs and placing the word “boy” in where he uses the word “girl” and it all seemed like perfect fits so I went with it. Apparently this story was fabricated, but it got me thinking; Justin Bieber is probably gay.

Think about it. He’s been with Selena Gomez for what now? A year, two years? He gives her extravagant gifts only to really throw it in everyone’s face that he’s “charming” and “so straight”.

If you were arguably the most famous person in the world, 18 and hot, wouldn’t you be single and exploring?! I sure would be.

Significant other? No thank you! And why wouldn’t she agree to it, who was she before the Biebs? Just another faceless Disney star. She’s so his beard, there is no doubt in my mind.

Okay, Jeremy thinks I think everyone is gay so I decided to see if there was anyone else in this world that had my same views, and turns out there are...TONS.

There is actually a whole website devoted to it named: http://isjustinbiebergay.info. He apparently has been quoted saying “Sexuality is a choice” which has raised speculation that he is ‘choosing’ to be straight.

These are just my weird observations involving celebrity news, agree with me or laugh at me; it makes no difference. But, when Justin comes out in a few years after he's sick of being the most famous person in the world you'll be thinking to yourself: "That little SOB was right, Ha!"

    Stop giving us more reasons to love you damnit! We all may, or may not, have heard about Gosling breaking up a street fight in the East Village last year, well this time he’s saving lives.

Gosling stopped a lady visiting from London from getting hit by a taxi by grabbing her away from the road as she was, of course, looking the wrong way while trying to cross.

What really perturbs me about this whole thing at that this broad is mad at the way media is portraying her as a “damsel in distress”. I’m sorry mate; Ryan Gosling just saved your life. If Ryan Gosling just saved my life, if I had those muscles wrapped around me and got a faint whiff of the perfect musky man smell that permeates off of his perfect skin 24/7; the media could say anything they wanted about me.

Seriously lady, you got to experience what 99% of the population can only dream about at night as they roll over only to see that their significant other still isn’t Ryan Gosling. If Ryan Gosling saved my life I would already be writing a book about it and setting up meetings to get an indie film started.

Can you even imagine? You walk into the street; see your life flash before your eyes and then a stranger grabs you from behind, saving your life. You turn around in his arms, possibly brush your forehead against the scruff of his chin and then see that perfectly chiseled smile that you have only dreamt about since you saw The Notebook...

I would faint.

And then when I woke up (in his arms) I imagine he would say something like: “Are you alright? Janelle, baby...are you okay? Don’t scare me like that. Let’s go get a drink, my treat. Then maybe you can come over to my apartment and lay down if you're still feeling weak...”

    Jeremy told me I needed to do this follow-up to my blog from yesterday and since I pretty much do whatever he tells me to do, I did it. So there is this phenomenon where rappers think just because they can lay down beats they can just be in any ol’ cop show or Tyler Perry movie.

You might be saying: “But Janelle, I don’t know of any other rappers that are trying to act except Ice T.” And if you’re not saying that, you’re saying: “Janelle, who the hell is Ice T?”

Allow me to break it down for you, this is Ice T, he was a huge rapper in the 80s and 90s, and is now a detective, well, he plays one on TV.

This is Donnie Wahlberg, now most wouldn’t classify him as a rapper, he was more of a “talker with attitude”, but out of all of the boys from NKOTB he was definitely the most badass, and isn’t that what half of being a rapper is? (Unless you’re Will Smith of course.)

Then we have Eminem and 50 cent who really have only acted in their own biopic, they played themselves, and I bought it.

Kid Cudi, mostly known for his one song Day and Night a few years back, also had a short lived sitcom on HBO called “How to Make it in America” where he played a dog-walking drug dealer, which might not be too far off from what he’s currently doing.

Then we have Xzibit who really exhibited his talent in the popular MTV series “Pimp My Ride”. Come on, that took a lot of talent to mean mug the camera and cross his arm while it panned out into commercial.

Ludacris did a great job in Crash playing a hoodlum who stole cars for a living while bitching about being stereotyped.

But let’s not discredit the actors-turned-rappers, which there is only one: Drake. He grew up in the halls of Degrassi playing a handicapped basketball player at a Canadian High School, and if you were wondering; he’s a much better rapper than actor.

Here are some rappers that need to stick to what they know best: making beats and spitting rhymes:

-Snoop Dog

-LL Cool J

-Ja Rule

-Master P.

Any comments/concerns with this list? Let me guess...LL Cool J is your favourite actor, and you loved him in In the House and you think I'm crazy...Let me know!